Well, it’s just about that time—I’m down to my last days at Hillel.  Hillel has been an integral part of my life for almost four years.  When we first started, we were a mish-mash group of young adults meeting behind the headquarters of our yearly meeting, in a rented space that we shared with countless others.  We had a little place in that room that was ours—it had a corkboard full of events, brochures, and pronouncements of our beliefs.  It had a calendar that featured a different beagle each month—a gift from me, of course. We sang, I preached, we worshipped.  We ate and talked, and made plans for the upcoming week.

That seems like a lifetime ago.  In October of 2005, we decided (with much pain and deliberation) to leave the rented space and begin house church.  I wrote about in an article for ESR magazine: 

After a time it became apparent that we still had not found ourselves.  This led to a painful journey that challenged us a community and as individuals.  In the end, we realized that if we were to have the intimate, authentic community we were seeking, we must abandon our building and go into our homes.  Thus began the “three week Hillel cycle”.  For three weeks at a time, we meet in one of our member’s homes for snacks, “catching up”, and silent worship.  We don’t focus on learning through a traditional sermon—I am among the few pastors who can say that’s not a part of my job.  Instead, we seek to learn through messages brought in Meeting, and through small groups that we call “shepherding groups”. The term “small groups” is misleading—Hillel only has 7 to 9 attendees, but we get together on a smaller scale in order to read, talk, and learn together about a subject of our choosing.  We also get together frequently for dinner, volunteering, movies, and other things that friends do.  Community and a relationship that’s interdependent upon God and each other is the very crux of Hillel’s existence; we don’t have any particular goals for the future—no big budget plans, no plan to move back into a building, no committees that may weigh us down. 

This is what makes Hillel unique.  This meeting literally flies by the seat of its ‘plain’ pants…  It is a Meeting with tremendous potential—but it will take work.  Hillel’s future depends on commitment in a variety of ways—attendance at worship and other Hillel functions, financial responsibility, making relationships with Hillel members a priority in one’s social life, and of course, committing to individual growth through the willingness to be tested, challenged, and changed.   

As I turn the ‘corner’ on my spiritual journey, and head elsewhere in Quakerdom, I encourage Hillel to jog along the path as well.  Don’t get too comfortable—God may throw a wrench in things (like asking the pastor to step down, and when she refused, pushing her off the invisible pulpit).  Let him challenge your beliefs and notions about the world, and let him guide you into the next phase of Hillel life.  Don’t get discouraged about numbers—believe me, quality within the meeting is always better than quantity.  Don’t let people make you feel inferior because you don’t have a building—remember, the early church never had buildings either, and they did just fine.  Don’t forget that while you’re Christians, you are also Quakers.  Never forget that.  If you  compromise Quakerism, then you threaten what is special about yourselves.  Remember, Quakers value peace, equality, simplicity, integrity, and community (among so many other things) because Christ first said we should.   

Don’t stop being a light in our community.  Stand up for what is fair, and what is from love.  Don’t let fear inhibit you—but when you speak up or stand up, do it gently, and always listen with an open mind to what your opponent says.  Remember, you have no enemies—that’s just not possible when you love Jesus.  You may have idiots in your life that make you so mad you see ‘red’, but always go back to that place of love, understanding, and forgiveness.  Remember what Jesus said to the people as he was traveling through their town:

“No one after lighting a lamp covers it with a bowl or hides it under a bed.  Instead, the person puts it on a lampstand so those who come in will see the light…” (Luke 8:16)

Remember that I love you, and will always be grateful for the opportunity you gave me.  I have enjoyed serving you, and will surely miss the banter, community, and even the aggravation that has become my life at Hillel.  We may not see each other as much as we used to, but take comfort in the knowledge that we are still members of the same community in Christ, and that I will be attempting to shine my light along with yours. 

In love & light,April

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As you know, this is Black History Month.  This is one of my favorite times of the year, as African American History is one of my favorite “subjects”.  Last night, in lieu of the much-hyped Super Bowl, Alan and I watched the Spike Lee documentary 4 Little Girls.  It is about the 1960’s tragic bombing at the 16^th Street Baptist Church in Birmingham that killed four little girls.  So, in the Quaker tradition, I thought I would pose a query for self-examination during this month.  As the economic status of many Americans, but blacks in particular, is of great concern to me, the query is of an economic nature.

Are you concerned that our economic system shall so function as to sustain and enrich the life of all?  Do you as workers, employers, producers, consumers, and investors endeavor to cultivate goodwill and mutual understanding in your economic relationships? 

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So, I’m still thinking about the film Jesus Camp.  In particular, I can’t shake one of the pieces of “advice” good ol’ Pastor Becky gave her kids.  She was preaching about sin, and made her way around to the topic of Harry Potter.  Let me establish here that I’m a big Potter fan, and I doubt I’m the only Jesus follower who is.  Any way, Pastor “B” informed her kids that Harry Potter is evil.  Her advice?  “You don’t make heroes out of warlocks.”  But what really shocked me was what she next—she asked the kids if they knew that had this been Old Testament times, Harry Potter would be put to death.  Hum.  Well, let’s establish two things—Harry Potter is not a real person!  He’s a book character, so maybe the Potter books would have been burned, but it would be quite difficult to actually execute Harry himself.  My second point is one Pastor “B” already made, even though she didn’t actually say it: we are not living under the old law because Christ ushered in a new law. As sad as she may be about that truth, the fact is, we don’t have to worry about what would have happened—it no longer matters.  So why even introduce an argument based upon a law that no longer exists? That’s like arguing that we don’t make heroes out of black Americans like Barach Obama.  I can just hear someone asking, “Did you know that if these were still the antebellum years, blacks would be enslaved?”  Please. That’s ridiculous.  Don’t threaten people about punishments that are antiquated.  In many ways, it says that Pastor “B” cannot come up with a valid reason, that applies to this current time, about why one should not read the Potter books.By the way, Obama is one of my political heroes—his color makes little difference to me (except that if he wins, we’ll finally get to see someone who isn’t white sitting in the oval office!). 

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I find it interesting that we are so scared of terrorists of the Muslim faith.  We spend so much time and energy fearing a group from far away, when we have our own, good ‘ol made-in-America  “terrorists” to contend with.  Let me explain. I just watched a documentary called Jesus Camp.  It’s an eye-opening (and scary, if you are like me) look at the indoctrination into the world of extreme evangelicalism.   

It features the daily life of kids in extreme, fanatical Christian families.  Many of the kids are home schooled, and all live in homes that are saturated with white-bread Christian culture.  Not the Christian culture of Jesus’ community—in fact, except for the Bible, Jesus is talked about as if he is somehow separated from the world he walked, talked, slept, preached, and probably got sick in.  It seems to ignore, except for the bloody (and I mean bloody—there’s definitely an emphasis on his bloody death) crucifixion, that Jesus was a real person—he got pissed off, felt lonely, worried, and ate real food (and it wasn’t from Chik-Fil-A!).  It ignores that his favorite friends weren’t very respected—hell, they weren’t even Christians.  The kind of religion practiced in the film seems so artificial and political—like the plastic cross one purchases at the bible bookstore to hang in their rear-view mirror (which is supposed to somehow help other believers identify them).  It’s so one-dimensional.  This kind of faith doesn’t look at all like the deeply spiritual, truly life-altering faith of some believers that I can think of, such as Brian McLaren, St. Francis of Assisi, Mother Teresa, or even the evangelical favorite (more beloved than Jesus, perhaps?) Paul.  Their faith was multi-dimensional, and it really changed the world.  It didn’t piss off and even alienate those outside the faith (or inside, for that matter).  I would rather be identified as a Christian (by those a part of and apart from the faith) as a result of my love, service, listening skills, compassion for all, etc. than the Christian rock blasting from my radio. 

So what do you think goes on at Christian camp?  Team and self-confidence building?  Bible lessons designed for children about how they can better serve their community and be good at home?  How about those good old ghost stories (that we know aren’t real—at least I think they aren’t—but love anyway?)?  Not at Jesus Camp.  Oh, you’ll find team building—but it’s of a Republican sort.  One scene features a “visit” by the beloved president himself—a cardboard cut-out of Bush was presented at the pulpit, where the children were required to greet him and pray for his efforts to achieve the conservative agenda. I was scared nearly to tears as I watched little kids cry and shake over their “sins”.  One child was brought to the floor in shame because he had dared to question whether or not the Bible was true.  Wasn’t it in the Bible that Thomas questioned Jesus about his authenticity?  Was he not rewarded for his seeking? Another child dismissed quiet, contemplative churches (like many Quaker Meetings) as “dead”.  She thought God only showed up to loud churches like the mega-church she was a part of. Probably the saddest part was the opinion voiced by one little boy—a child considered to have great leadership potential (by the camp staff).  He said that he didn’t feel good around non-believers—in essence that they creeped him out.  He said they made him sick, then promptly noted that that was perhaps the case because they were sick.  I was immediately reminded of a passage of Scripture:“Very few people will die to save the life of someone else.  Although perhaps for a good person someone might possibly die.  But God shows his great love for us in this way: Christ died for us while we were still sinners.”  (Romans 5:7-8) 

God loves all of his creation—even when they aren’t (and perhaps especially) squeaky clean.  Remember Jesus discussing the prodigal son?  The greatest celebration is saved for the return of the lost.  So, it was with great sorrow that I heard a child saying that those out of the Christian faith make him sick.  Jesus’ best friends were the dirty and criminal.  

A final note about the film—the pastor of the camp is a woman named Becky Fischer.  Well, I guess those particular Christians don’t always interpret the bible literally…  

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The day after Thanksgiving, when many of us were feeling fat and happy (and maybe tired from overspending at the mall), I was driving from house to house doing my pet runs.  I was listening to the Tavis Smiley show on NPR.  He had two guests that night—one who worked with America’s Second Harvest, the nation’s largest food pantry for the needy, and the other a researcher at the Heritage Foundation, a Conservative policy think tank.  The Second Harvest affiliate was talking about the shocking number of Americans who are hungry—approximately 13% of households in North Carolina in 2004 (see their website at http://www.secondharvest.org/).  The main point of her discussion was a new report out by the government about poverty and food insecurity in the U.S.   A recent report produced by the Second Harvest gives some of the same figures Smiley’s guest referred to. Called the Almanac of Hunger and Poverty, it focuses on poverty rates in each state, as well looks at poverty and food insecurity in particular groups, such as children and the elderly.  An estimated 35 million Americans are living in situations where they do not know where their next meal will come from.

 If you’re alarmed, or even motivated to help these folks, don’t be—at least that’s what Robert Rector, the Heritage researcher, says. He is so frustrated with concerned folks “crying wolf” about food insecurity that he wrote an article about it:

 Today’s Special: Another “Hunger Crisis”By Robert Rector

It’s Thanksgiving, and political activists are serving up a familiar dish: cries of alarm about a “hunger crisis” in America. The Chicago-based group America’s Second Harvest, for example, says millions of American children suffer from hunger. The Food Research and Action Center claims that 29 percent of all U.S. children — nearly one out of every three — is hungry or “at risk” of hunger.But such startling claims are refuted by the federal government’s own data. Surveys conducted by the Department of Health and Human Services show that 96 percent of American families report that they have “enough food to eat.” About 3 percent say they “sometimes” don’t have enough food. Only one half of 1 percent say they “often” don’t have enough food.These data also reveal an ironic fact: Nearly half of the people who claim they lack food are overweight. In fact, obesity is most common among the tiny group claiming they “often” lack food.Are one-third of U.S. children hungry? In reality, American children, both rich and poor, are remarkably well nourished. The average amount of protein, vitamins and minerals consumed by poor children is virtually identical with what middle-class children consume. In most cases, it greatly exceeds recommended norms. For example, poor children, on average, take in more than 200 percent of the “recommended daily allowance” of protein, a relatively expensive nutrient.Health problems relating to the under-consumption of food are scarce among both poor and middle-class children. Thinness (low weight for height) and stunting (low height for age) are virtually non-existent among both groups. In fact, poor American children are simply giants by international or historic standards. By the time poor boys reach age 18, they are, on average, one inch taller and 10 pounds heavier than a middle-class boy of the same age in the late 1950s.Poor Americans do face health problems related to diet, but these mainly stem from an over-consumption of food, not food scarcity. In a nation plagued by excess calories, the poor are most likely to be overweight. Nearly half of poor adult women are overweight, compared to a third of non-poor women.Medical experts have expressed concern over the growth of obesity among American children. Unfortunately, obesity is most common among poor children. A recent medical study of low-income black and Hispanic students in Central Harlem found that 25 percent were “obese,” and more than half of that group was “super-obese.“Recently, the government’s principal food program for children (Women, Infants and Children) issued a study claiming that it wasn’t responsible for the alarming growth of obesity among poor children. Whenever you have the government’s major feeding program denying responsibility for obesity among the poor, it seems reasonable to conclude that activist claims of a widespread “hunger crisis” are just a bit overblown.Finally, many believe that lack of money forces poor people to eat low-quality diets deficient in nutrients and high in fat. But government survey data show that nutrient richness (the amount of vitamins, minerals and protein per calorie of food) is the same for poor and middle- class Americans. And the diets of poor people, on average, are no higher in fat than the diets of the middle class.Some poor people, particularly in the inner city, do have diets that are very high in fat. But this problem can be blamed on the heavy consumption of take-out “fast food.” A diet laden with “Big Macs” and “Super-Size Fries” isn’t healthy, but it’s hardly evidence of a food shortage or a lack of money to buy food.I’m not suggesting that periodic hunger doesn’t occur in America. But far from being a crisis, hunger is a limited problem, and one that usually doesn’t last very long. For example, U.S. Department of Agriculture surveys show that, in the last month, about one American child in 200 missed one or more meals due to the family’s lack of money for food. This is a cause for concern, of course, but it is far short of a national epidemic.More importantly, when temporary hunger does occur, it is often linked to behavioral problems that are far more troubling than simple food shortages. In the inner city, for example, up to 80 percent of children are born outside of marriage. Drugs and crime are rampant. Activist groups may think they’re doing poor Americans a favor, but bogus claims of a “hunger crisis” only distract attention from these all-too-real problems.

A comment made by  Rector on the Tavis Smiley show really sums up his article best.  I can’t quote verbatim, but I do remember the essence of what he said.  He told Smiley and his other guest that perhaps the real problem is that people in poverty don’t know how to spread meals out evenly.  He suggested that instead of eating a whole lot at the beginning of the month, they spread their meals out over the course of the entire month. In other words, they should ration their food.  Is this man for real? When has he skipped a meal in order to ensure his kids would eat? When did he last feel the pain of hunger yet was unable to do anything about it? I wonder when he last rationed his food?  Maybe he did it over Thanksgiving, ensuring that instead of one nice, large meal, he’d have a whole month of turkey leftovers.  It’s a good thing this privileged white man is thin, otherwise I’d point out that maybe he, too, doesn’t know how to spread out his meals properly.Instead of accusing the poor of ineffective rationing skills, we ought to ask ourselves why the idea of rationing is even necessary in what some would think is the best country in the world.  To Rector’s credit, he did say that food stamps should cover nutritious foods instead of the junk and soda they typically pay for now.  And he’s right.  But that’s just a start.  We need to help people find jobs that will bring them out of poverty, and most Americans, whether secure in food or not, need to learn how to eat better.  But that won’t happen as long as junky, fast food and poor quality items at the store are what so many can afford.  I think the poor have it difficult enough as it is—we need not blame them for their hunger pains as well.   

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For years, my whole life really, I lived in a private prison of self-judgment.  I thought that I was cold and heartless.  My actions did not reflect this belief, for the most part at least.  But inwardly, I struggled with my lack of attachment to others that I know most people feel.  When I saw a child, or heard a sad story, I would make the appropriate expressions outwardly, but internally I felt little or nothing at all.  This is still the case today.  The exceptions were with animals and in the early stages of every romantic relationship I’ve been in.  In fact, when it came to romance, I had a near obsession with the person I was with—and that obsession engulfed my emotional and physical being with a kind of stranglehold.  But eventually, that would subside, and I’d feel the way about that person that I felt for other people.  Not a kind of complacency, but a lack of emotional attachment that one would expect a reasonable person to have.  And so I came to believe that I was incapable of really loving; that in fact, I did not know or understand love.  I still think this is the case—at least when comparing love to the rules of neurotypicals.  But, I am not a neurotypical—I am mildly autistic.  Regardless of where one falls on the autism spectrum—severe or mild, I think this is the case.  Love is a difficult concept for us.  But then I remembered this: “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, and it is not proud.  Love is not rude, is not selfish, and does not get upset with others.  Love does not count up wrongs that have been done.  Love is not happy with evil but is happy with the truth.  Love patiently accepts all things.  It always trusts, always hopes, and always remains strong… Love never ends.” (1^st Corinthians 13:4-8) So whether you love in the emotional, attached way that is expected, or whether you love through the cocoon of autism, the best way to love is God’s way.  It’s simple, straightforward, and honest.  It lacks fanfare.  And it involves sacrifice.  One need not be warm and fuzzy to love this way.

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You know me—I see something, and my Aspie self runs away with literal images of what the underlying meaning could be.  So instead of me ranting about yet another church sign, I want to know what you think.  Here’s what I saw:“In everything, give thanks to God.  It is His will.”   So, post a comment below and tell me your thoughts.

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I had the “fortune” of coming across another John Hagee show the other day—this one was about a program he has started called Exodus II (see http://www.jhm.org/exodus2.asp).  The purpose and goals are highlighted here, taken from a revealing look at his website: Through John Hagee Ministries, Christians are uniting in support for the State of Israel and the Jewish people… John Hagee Ministries has been able to donate more than 19 million dollars to various causes that support the Jewish people. These causes include education, repatriation, rebuilding and relocating children to safe zones, as well as providing medical equipment and supplies for the Jewish people injured in terrorist attacks… We have aided in tens of thousands of God’s Chosen to be brought back to their covenant… In Psalm 122:6, King David commands all Christians, “Pray for the peace of Jerusalem: May they prosper who love you.” The scriptural principle of personal prosperity is tied to blessing Israel and the city of Jerusalem… Why did Jesus Christ go to the house of the Centurion and heal his servant who was ready to die? Jesus went because the Gentile Centurion deserved the blessing of God because he had demonstrated his love for God’s chosen people, the Jews, by building a synagogue in Israel (Luke 7:5). 
When you do things to bless the Jewish people and the state of Israel, God will bless you. Your support of the nation of Israel through Exodus II strengthens their nation. As the Jewish leaders say, every Jewish person coming to Israel strengthens the nation… [Scripture verifies] that PROSPERITY (Genesis 12:3 and Psalm 122:6), HEALING (Luke 7:1-5) and the OUTPOURING OF THE HOLY SPIRIT came first to Gentiles that blessed the Jewish people and the nation of Israel in a practical manner. 

Let me begin by saying that I absolutely love the Jewish people, and I understand (and support) their effort to get to their homeland should they desire to do so.  However, replace the words Jewish people, and plug in whatever you like as far as race, religion, and country of origin:  that’s how I really feel.  The exception would probably be any person who interprets their religious beliefs to mean that they can harm any human or animal—terrorists, fundamentalists, that kind of thing.  I only say that because in the past some individuals have misinterpreted my blogging to mean that I am for a free-for-all.  Not so—common sense ought to dictate otherwise, but because it doesn’t, I felt the need to address that possible interpretation of what I am saying here.So, getting to the actual point of this blog… My concern here is Hagee’s apparent obsession with exclusively blessing Jews over people of other nations and/or religions.  The underlying reason appears to be the sole desire to gain a blessing from God, apparently explicitly promised to the Christians in the Old Testament.  Never mind that Christians weren’t even around then…  But it isn’t what I’ve already cited that really disturbs me—it’s a grossly narrow interpretation of Scripture that he used on his program. He used a famous instruction given by Jesus—“I tell you this: whenever you saw a brother or sister hungry or cold, whatever you did to the least of these, so you did to me” (Matthew 25, from the Voice of Matthew).  So, then, who is a brother or sister?  A Jew?  Yes, perhaps during that time.  But it isn’t Jews who typically read this passage–it’s Christians.  The narrowest interpretation during this time would have to be, at least to me, the Christians.  But back to that pesky question, “Who is a brother or a sister?”  Well, someone asked Jesus, “Who is my neighbor?” (Luke 10:29) And I think that may be the better question, as I believe it gives us the answer to our first question:  He tells the parable of the Good Samaritan.  Sister Magdalen writes, “the neighbor is the one who shows mercy. Then Christ says, ‘Go and do you likewise.’ [So] the question becomes, ‘How can I be a good neighbor?’ By my becoming a good neighbor to others, everyone becomes a neighbor to me. We are asked not to find a neighbor but to become a neighbor”.  She follows this by referencing another part of Scripture—“Whoever does not love a neighbor whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen” (1 John 4:20).So, if all are my neighbors, and Christ has instructed me to do as the Good Samaritan did, then blessing only one aspect of God’s creation—in Hagee’s case, the Jews—then I run the risk of living a small life in Christ.  It’s not that God won’t accept my kindness, but it’s that I’ll miss out on all the joy, community, and yes, even blessings (though not necessarily the kind Hagee refers to) that will surly come if I’d open my heart to all of his people (and creation in general).

 
 
 
 
 
 
   

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You know I don’t see many of these—church signs that are truly thoughtful.  Usually they are damning or judgmental, or just plain stupid.  But this one read, “No man ever got lost on a straight road”.  I was thinking just how insightful this is—a path that just consists of God and his ways will surely keep you from becoming spiritually lost.  But then I realized what one might miss out on if they indeed “travel” in this manner.  I thought about the many side roads I’ve taken over the years.  Some were uneventful.  But others were decidedly adventurous.  They weren’t always safe—there were times when I became spiritually lost for sure.  There were times when I lost sight of everything completely.  But those were also the times when God appeared to work the most in my life—bringing me to where I am now.  Even the road to Quakerism was a side one for me.  I literally made a wrong turn and drove by a Friends Church, and thus began my life in the world of Friends.  I look back on the many turns I took, and God has taught me so much about those times.  I frequently use them in my ministry.  And to think, if I’d walked a straight path continuously, I’d never have that “baggage” I’d collected along the way—the baggage that makes me who I am as a follower of Christ.

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I like Catholic television.  If you have cable (which I don’t, but most of my pet sitting clients do!), you’ve probably breezed by it while “flipping”.  I like some of the programming—especially the new music showcase and the reruns of Mother Angelica and the nuns reciting the Holy Rosary.  So I turned to it while watching TV the other day, and instead of the usual programming I’m used to, there was a televised church service being led by John Hagee.You know from a previous blog how I feel about this individual, so I won’t go into that again.  Nevertheless, he was still able to surprise me with his words.  He was preaching about Christians and Jews.  At first I thought this would be good—the church doesn’t have a good history (in my opinion) of reaching out to the Jewish people.  I saw an example of this recently—Alan and I were attending the local Jewish festival.  As we were parking, we saw a guy protesting the celebration; he had a sign that read The Jews killed Jesus.  I was so embarrassed—ideas like that seem to ignore the fact that Jesus himself was a Jew.  But this wasn’t exactly the essence of Hagee’s message—he did address, briefly, the problem of Christian anti-Semitism.  But his real point was about uniting with the Nation of Israel—quite different from recognizing a shared history with the Jews as a people.  His motivation was political.  He is part of a movement called Christians United for Israel.  He was preaching at a church on Capital Hill, with the goal of raising the government’s awareness of this group.  He called for pre-emptive strikes on Iran, as they are a sworn enemy of Israel.  He led the audience in a chant about supporting Israel, and pronounced diplomacy efforts with nations like Iran “brain-dead”.  He called upon Christians and Jews to unite against radical Islam, and called moderate Muslims “silent” against their radical counterparts.  I found all this rhetoric humorous—does Hagee not realize that he, too, is a radical?  Does he not see that he is promoting war, alliances against “enemies”, and nationalism—much as radicals of other faiths do?Finally, he pointed out that we must support Israel if we desire God’s blessings.  Ah…the real reason for uniting.  Not because he loves Jews (I’m sure he does, though), but because he wants something as a result of that relationship.  That’s like entering into a relationship with Jesus to save yourself from “hell”.  It seems so disingenuous.My real concern is the call for war, however.  And in light of wanting God’s blessings, I’d think Hagee would pay more attention to Jesus’ instructions about this kind of thing.  Did Christ not say, “blessed are the peacemakers”?  I think he did.  In fact, he said “you’re blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight” (Matthew 5, The Message).  Should Christians and Jews unite?  Of course—but it shouldn’t end there.  All people of all faiths should unite, find our commonalities as humans, and work for peace.  Only then will we begin to realize the many blessings God has given us.

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